Truth in a False World

Another page of her childhood has turned and given way to memory.

Just twenty-four hours ago she left behind 5th grade and will, in the blink of an eye, be entering middle school.  That one with the button nose, freckled and sun kissed, oh how I wish I could still time and keep her right where she is.  I want this to never, ever end.  Yesterday, before school I sat back and just took her all in, watching from afar.   She was busy chatting with friends, laughing, looking all too grown up.  Her eyes never met mine and mine never left her face.  How do I slow time's current, the river ever rushing?

She is looking forward to lockers and friends and growing up, anticipating the world of the big girl.  And me, I want nothing more than for her to put her red Mary Janes back on her feet and curl up together, retreat to the days of dolls and tricycles and no thought of anything grown up, just savor those moments of childhood a minute longer.

  I know well how rocky the road to adulthood can be.

  Mental snapshots, pictures of where her feet have trod run through my mind and almost without thought I pray for God to guide her next and every step, to help her always walk in a manner worthy of the calling He has on her life.

The last few weeks there is a mental burden on my shoulders, life lessons to teach that must come through my funnel, His funnel.  There are things she needs to know.

  Like how her name is just what she is;  gift from God, unmerited favor. 

Like how what she chooses in a moment will determine what she will experience in many future moments.  Every choice carrying with it blessing or consequence.

Like how this world will tell her that the appearance of her face and body are more important than the state of her heart, and how very wrong they are.

Like how boys may turn her head, but there is one, already chosen by The One, for her alone - in His right and good time and how precious her innocence is to him and Him.  God doesn't say "No".  He says, "Not now."

Like no matter how good a friend is, there are no perfect people, only shadows of grace in a fallen world.  And that girls at this age can be so fickle and hurtful.   It is her job to live like Him, extend grace and forgive.  70x7.

Like no matter what, she is fearfully and wonderfully made, perfectly imperfect.  She is meant to be just as she is.  It would never do for her to try to be someone else.

I want to tell her that character matters and integrity is important.  That being kind makes a difference and that a spirit of gratitude is rare.   I want her to know that though the world is ugly, it is beautiful and that by merely paying attention, looking for His gifts, she can live this one life well.  Moment by moment.

 

 "What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are tiny matters compared to what lives within us."

                              Ralph Waldo Emerson

Lemon Butter Popcorn

Hands down it is THE favorite after school snack around here.  Unless you count Dairy Queen just down the street from school but, that would blow my post out of the water so let’s just stick with homemade snacks- k?

They love it because it tastes great and I love it because I know exactly what’s in it.  No hard to pronounce ingredients, no plastic packaging, no mess to clean out of the microwave.

Here’s what you’ll need:

• popping corn {any kind is fine, but Orville is my tried and true}
• 1/2 stick of butter {the real thing, no margarine - ew!}
• juice of 1/2 fresh lemon {squeeze lemon into melted butter}
• coarse kosher salt {softer and slightly sweeter than table salt}

Oh, I forgot.  One or more helpers {this one will work, don’t you think?}

It really is quite self explanatory.  Pop the corn, add salt and butter to taste, and presto, you have one amazing snack!

Watching the corn pop...here it comes!

How about you?  What is your favorite snack?

Blessings Friends,

Kim

Taking Care of a Little Business

Happy Saturday everyone!!

I thought I'd jump on here and take care of a little blogging business before our day really gets going.  Most days I post something deep and reflective.  Some days I don't feel that way and just want to shoot the breeze with you all. Today is one of those days.

Lucky you.

It is a big day at our house.  Boone turns one today.  Who is Boone you ask?  Well, he is our much loved, highly adored Beagle pup. {I know, I'll get pictures posted soon - I'll speak to that in just a minute}.   We bought this little nut nearly a year ago after many pleads and moans for a puppy.  He was just irresistible and ended up at our house the day after we first saw him.

At the time we reasoned that no child should ever grow up without a puppy. Now we think that growing up without a dog might be an OK idea - they'll survive.

Case in point:  So far Boone has celebrated his birthday by tearing through the family room {where he is not allowed - I have dog hair issues.  Like, I want to sit on my furniture and not be covered in dog hair when I get up!}, he has jumped up ON the couch, sailed over the half wall that divides our family room and kitchen, landed in said kitchen, and completed this birthday obstacle course by dragging his bed around the kitchen, attempting to tear it apart like any good hunting hound worth his salt would do to a rabbit.

He may not see two.

The other big news is that the Tooth Fairy visited Grace last night.  It is practically raining molars here at our house and that dang Tooth Fairy just keeps forgetting to stop by.  Well, she did last night - halleluiah!  It seems she finally got her tired act together and remembered to leave a little something under her pillow.  Unfortunately, this Tooth Fairy took with her the tiny treasure chest that holds the tooth.... who knew?  I guess she was supposed to know that she is to leave it,  but seeing as she is filling in for the Tooth Fairy that is currently camping with our oldest, she had to wing it.

She may not make it either.

On to the blogging business I was speaking of.  My hope for this blog is that it would be a place of encouragement, a thing of beauty in your day.  I also hope to weave in our family life and document our journey together.  I want to have some fun here, too.  I love fun!  I am all about the fun!  I'm hoping to do a monthly giveaway, just some fun products and neat things that I've come across and think you might enjoy.  In order to do that, I need people to leave comments so I can get a feel of how many people are actually checking in on a daily basis.  I have enabled this site to accept comments from anyone, whether you have a blog or not.

If you stop by and like what you read, could you please leave a comment?  You can even leave a comment if you don't like what you read, but I'll probably delete it.  :0)   You just click on 'comments' under each post.  You'll be able to see yours as well as read others.  It is a great way to develop an online community -  who knows?  You all may have a lot in common!

On another business note, I'm working on learning how to incorporate our own photos into my posts.  They make a post so much more interesting.  Doing so involves all kinds of technical what not and blah, blah, blah.  And I am a girl who runs from technical blah, blah, blah.

  Like Joseph ran from Potiphar's wife, that kind of running.  {I love Biblical humor, don't you?!}

Soooo....  I'm getting there.  Slowly.  Hopefully there will pictures next week when the Tooth Fairy comes home from camping- {he's a genius with that kind of stuff}.  And it's not the last week of school.  And finals are done.  And all the end-of-the-year- gifts have been given.  And the 200+ potluck dishes we have been assigned to bring have been consumed.  And all the sports are wrapped up.  And I can take a minute to just breathe.

Oh, I now have advertising on the sidebar of the blog.  Would you mind clicking on those if they interest you?  It would help generate some much needed income.  Don't feel pressured - only if it something you are interested in.  I have issues even asking this, but it is an honest appeal.

OK - I think that takes care of business on my end.

I'll leave you with a quote for today.  I thought it was fitting after all the rain we've had here recently.  It is so true and just lovely.

               "Happiness?  The color of it must be spring green....."

                                     -Francis Mayes, American memoirist

Blessings,
Kim

Making a Small Life Large

If I am painfully honest, I am one who so easily sees what others have.  Sadly, it is all too easy to fall into the typical mindset of the vast majority of us Western Hemisphere Dwellers. 

I eat, and yet I am hungry.   I am given, and yet I want more.

Isn't that the human inheritance?  The legacy of the Garden?  Our fall was and always will be that we aren't satisfied in God and what He gives.  I believe it is just that which is the catalyst for most sin - we continually seek more, bigger, better.  We have failed to see this earthly world for what it was intended to be, not a way to a bigger, better self, but the means to a deep relationship with a bigger, better, wholly satisfying God!

So what do I do about this?  How do I begin to unravel the twisted mess of the Garden, this all consuming lack of gratitude?   I think back on the Israelites and how for forty long years they wandered the wilderness.  They daily gathered the manna, the nourishment that fell from heaven, that they weren't sure what it was, but it filled their hungry stomachs and souls.

And I question - what is my manna?  What must I search out daily to sustain and fill me?

I believe the remedy lies in the aperture of my eye.  That thing that sheds light on life and gives new perspective,  lens I choose to see through.

My search is long and hard and I land in this place of grace and beauty and I discover eucharisteo.  A Greek word meaning thanksgiving with the root word chara tucked in the middle and that word means joy.  Is it possible that by giving thanks, I find joy?  Is the key to a full, joy-filled life to give thanks in all things, for all things?

So I begin to take pen to paper and list the gifts He gives, naming the ways He loves.

411. spring rain taps the panes
412. clean cotton to sleep in
413. birdsong seeps in through cracked window
414. soft snore of dreaming pup
415. cookies baking in oven
416. lunch in the middle of the day, because we miss each other

The list began with one, and now it's in the hundreds, and I'm pressing for thousands because His gifts are mesmerizing and His fingerprints are addicting!  I am a woman wooed and by listing the graces He pours over me, my seemingly small life is made large!  I am making the invisible, visible.  

Who knew, by this simple act, I would laugh deeper, hug my children tighter, kiss my husband's lips longer, discover a way to release worry's choking grip and be more able to give of myself?  All because I have listed the gifts, the ways He loves.

And before I know it, I realize that all I want... is all I have.

Blessings,
Kim

 

 

Pearls of Wisdom

I believe it was first grade.

  First grade when I fully realized that all I ever wanted to be was a mama.

The teacher, she asked us to draw what we wanted to be when we were all grown.  Sharp point of pencil connected to paper and carefully, painstakingly I drew a mama.  Swollen tummy, long, beautiful hair, stick arms and legs, and a shirt with an arrow pointing downward and the word, 'bump' written across it. {I was a child of the '70's - anyone remember those shirts??}

In mind's eye, I can still see that paper with the lead sketching, although it has long been in the trash; withered, faded to nothing.

Thirty five times more around the sun and I am a mama.  I have birthed three babes and smelled heaven on  fresh heads and counted fingers and toes and held the inconsolable.  I have rocked and walked and bounced and faced the angry, fiery tempers of the two's and three's.  I have shed first day of school tears and mission trip good-bye tears.  My heart has swelled with pride and broken with disappointment.

Through it all, countless pages have been turned seeking advice, other's wisdom in a road walked before me.   I settle on four points that have completely altered my parenting.   May I share?

Before directing, are you connecting?  
     Knowing all hearts thrive on physical touch, make sure all directions are preceeded by a gentle touch.   Making eye contact is crucial when giving instruction, it ensures you have their attention.  Shouting across the house may be convenient, but yields little fruit.  Children are more apt to obey when we have connected with them!


Instruct, then ask
     While maintaining eye contact, give thorough instructions.  Ask the child to repeat the instructions and then ask if they intend to obey.  It is difficult for a child to disobey when they have comitted to doing so.


They will know what is expected, by your inspection
     Bring closure to the instructions by inspecting their work.  Journey with the child to make sure they have done as you expect; advise or praise as needed.  Make sure to finish that which you began.

Praise with physical touch
      When the child has done as you have asked, praise them up with physical touch!!  Every little {and not so little} one loves to be affirmed with a gentle touch - it makes your praise go the distance and conveys sincerity. 


These bits of insight, pearls of wisdom, I thought would only bring me through the toddler years. How wrong I was!  They are still in use daily for the oldest and youngest and the one sandwiched between.

Sometimes we all quietly need to find our own way, sometimes we need help from others.  I hope this is helpful.


Blessings,
Kim

p.s. Much of this information came from my in-laws, they are parenting genius' and I am fortunate to be able to glean from their experience.  Some of it came from 'Growing Kids God's Way'.  And some of it came through complete desperation, trial and error.  The School of Hard Knocks, so to speak.



     
 

I Am Speechless

The Birth of a Mama

There are moments so significant that the passing of time does not fade them, no amount of life lived changes their impact on a soul.  Three times I've received such blessing and three times I've been nearly ushered into His throne room, that place where sacred meets secular, eager to receive His tender grace wrapped in blue or pink.

That first bundle; sky blue, oh how he was prayed for! Two and a half years to be exact, and when he came into this world, with that smell of heaven still upon his skin, we rejoiced, thanking God for his grace, all the while knowing we didn't deserve such lavish gift.  Twice more the blessing of new life came; pink, blue.  Each birthed from the same earthly parents, yet fashioned uniquely by their Heavenly Father.  At the birth of the third our house was full, as well my soul.

Nearly thirteen years later, I am a woman changed.  All those days of swaddling and soothing, turned into years of kissing scrapes and mending hearts, growing the young.  The work is ongoing and knows no rest.  And the tears, mine and theirs, they have survived the years; an often companion.  Some hot and angry, others proud and bittersweet.  Each one that falls shapes and molds me, requiring more of me than I ever thought I could give.  I bear the marks of motherhood, that daily stretching of self, on my body; stomach and hips.

And on my heart. 

I have known no other journey like this, this one that keeps me on my knees for no benefit to me, but all for them.  The path that keeps me surrendered to Him for them; that they might walk in blessing.  All the while knowing, "He gently leads those that have young." {Isa. 40:11}


 Many are the days I exhale the relief of knowing this load of raising the young is not mine alone to bear.  He goes before me, and lives within me, and He loves mine even more than I.  I don't have to be a perfect parent because He already is.  Knowing this I am free to enjoy these days, these sticky, sweet blackberry kisses days, these climbing trees and picking flowers and catching frogs days.  I will savor each and every day His grace allows, never wishing for time to move faster.  It will move fast enough without my help.

Wherever you find yourself today, whether it be with a messy, noisy house full of little ones, or maybe your nest is empty and you're relishing that, or if home is too quiet and your heart aches for the longing of just one, my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Happiest Mother's Day, Friends!


Blessings,
Kim

Adding Time or Stealing Hours?

We’re in a scary place, he and I.  We’re in a place where worry and fear cling to me like a shadow; black,  always following.  We have walked away from the traditional job and started this business so that the man might be fulfilled deep in his soul and do what he was born to do, to work the land and feed the families and provide for his own.

But this place and the worry can entirely undo me.  Many are the days I run the errands and buy the needs and I think how is it possible?  How do we cover all the needs?   You see, there are three who continue to grow tall and the food they eat is endless, and the bills know no free month, and there is still the matter of the roof over our heads and the soles under our feet.   We lay in the early hours before the sun is on the rise, fingers laced and we wonder, “Will we survive?  Will we be alright?”   There’s more to it than we thought.  The challenges are big and loom like mountains but he assures me we will be okay.   Does he really believe or is he brave for me?  He knows that matters of finances are my Achilles heel and he works to soothe my anxious mind, comfort me with his strength.

Days pass and I am on the hunt for the right surprise, gift for friend.  I pass a lone bird perched high on the shelf.  It seems this bird has eyes only for me and I turn 360 to make sure.  Yes, this small, iron bird is looking at me, through me.  All day long that bird keeps coming back to me, over and over.  I have believed long enough to know that when The Lord wants my attention, He gently presses the same thing again and again; luring.  I search His Word hard and I find spiritual treasure, golden words of peace.  “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear.  Is life not more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?  Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you not much more valuable than they?  Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” {Matthew 6:25-27, NIV}

  I wince as I look back in the rear view mirror of my life.  I chastise myself.  Has God not proven Himself faithful time and time again?  Has He not  given me more than I dared to ask for myself?   I confess, early on in this journey I believed His love might end, that a good God might run out of goodness.  If I believe as I say I do, I must fully trust.  Let go of worry’s choking grip and and open the palm to receive what He gives.  Professing to believe and not trusting are incompatible - square peg,  round hole. I read this verse again and my heart begins to relax. I can trust because He has proven Himself trustworthy!  I breathe deep and know that regardless of what comes, He carries me and mine, even there.  This belief I declare is intended to be a verb; an action of trust and it all begins by uncurling the clenched fingers, letting go of fear and worry and embracing a good God and everything He chooses to give. 

Perched on the kitchen sill is that iron bird, bathed in pink and orange; first light, calling me to the hard and daily work of trust.  And by trusting, I find there is no worry. 

Blessings,

Kim

Why Blog?

It’s first light on a Saturday and I’m awake.  The birds are singing the world awake and I don’t want to miss a note of it, winter’s been too quiet. My love sleeps silent and deep next to me, unaware of the thoughts that race.  The children sleep too, and downstairs I hear the pup stretch, waiting patiently for me to start his day.  My head’s filled with queries - why? how? who?

My knees are sore and I have travelled far on them.  This journey began years ago, this strange pull to words and pen.  I pray, “Use me, Lord?”   Christmas letters {of all things!} were sent and encouragement received. Scribbling my perspective once a year wasn’t enough but, there was no other reason.  Then a call came, “lead us?”  I agree, and a door opened.  Years pass and again God moved - the beginning of birth pains, few and far between the requests were and now weekly and sometimes daily, the mamas come and share their struggles and seek perspective.  Their woes are achingly familiar.  Again, I pray and ask God, “What?”   I tell Him I will do as He leads because the surest way I know to live His blessing is to surrender all - to die to self and surrender to His plan.  

 “Blog”, He says.

I exhale the breath I didn’t know I was holding and I am peaceful.  Peaceful because this is what it feels like to walk in the promise and provision the Lord has set before my feet.  Years of prayer answered with a single word.  It isn’t easy to be vulnerable, laid bare for the scrutiny of others, penning out my heart.  I wrestle childhood demons of rejection and insignificance, invisibility really, but this go-round I have the upper hand and it carries His sword of  Truth.  And thus, ‘Something Beautiful’ is born. 

Now all the uncertainty surrounding the why, and how, and who are quieted and I can steal a minute’s more rest next to him.  God will take care of the multitude of questions because He ordained this journey.  My part?  Obedience and tuning in to His leanings and putting pen to paper as the Spirit moves.

Journey with me?

Blessings,

Kim